Toy Story heroes Woody the cowboy and Buzz Lightyear will launch a daring rescue mission to rescue plastic action figure Special Ops Cody from Iraqi militants. The Mujahedeen Squadrons of Iraq have threatened to dismember Cody, or melt him with a cigarette lighter or perhaps pop off his arms and legs and replace them with components from Mr Potato Head.

Toy industry insiders, however, suggested Cody maker Dragon Models bankrolled the kidnapping to raise the profile and lift sales of the toy, described as “dorky” by children interviewed at Toys R Us by The Ripper.

Pixar Studios said the rescue operation would test their CGI technology to the limit as it would be necessary to animate Woody and Buzz into the real world. GI Joe was reportedly asked to take part but contacts believe he is working “deep cover” in Barbie’s dollhouse as her companion Deeply Catholic Ken has rushed to the bedside of Action Figure Pope in Rome.’